The support is abundant for new homeschoolers, for homeschoolers in the trenches, and for those contemplating homeschooling.
What method should you choose? What science curriculum is best for your middle schooler? Is there a chore chart that gets your children to clean the house magically? How do you handle the unmotivated high schooler? Can you even homeschool your child through high school?
Will your kids be damaged for life if you homeschool them? (No)
All of that used to matter to me - but I will be honest. It doesn’t matter to me now. Life is changing. I am getting ready to send my youngest to college in one week.
My homeschool career is over, and I’m going to say it - I AM SAD.
Don’t Forget This Mom
The other day when I felt particularly sorry for myself (more on that later), I made an Instagram post that resonated with many people. I wasn’t trying to solicit sympathy, I just wanted people to understand that the grief during this time is real and that it is so easy to forget about your friends in this stage of life.
One mom commented:
there is very little support for this season of life and it’s crazy hard!
There are many reasons why the end of a homeschool career is hard, and we need to acknowledge those reasons, sit with them and feel all the feels - then move on with grace.
For many, graduating their last child coincides with peri-menopause or menopause. That stage of life is NO JOKE!
We have been intimately involved with our children’s lives and educations for many years. Turning that off at graduation isn’t easy. Yes, we remain close to our children, but it changes when they enter adulthood.
The hugs and kisses you received when your kids were little have disappeared. Young adult children are making their way in the world, and often this can strain a relationship with their parents.
Our adult friendships have been with other homeschool moms. It is hard to keep in contact if you don’t have to see these friends because of your children.
Our daily routine and purpose have revolved around children for so long. We must cultivate new interests, possibly return to work, or discover productive ways to use our newfound time.
For the mom reading this who is still homeschooling her children - don’t forget your fellow travelers who are no longer on the same road as you! They have wisdom, empathy, and knowledge to offer.
And for the mom who is with me - a empty homeschool nester - I see you. I understand what you are going through.
I believe it is good to acknowledge your feelings and go through a period of grief, but God is good, and there is much ahead now that you have honed your intellect, patience, and practicality for so many years.
I hope to support you here as we move forward together in this next stage of life. (For now, you might want to print out these scripture cards. My first defense when my mind goes south is to remember the truth of what God says about me.)
Also, the following books (because you know I love to read!) have been helpful to me in this stage of life. I have found this book to be a gold mine of information as I parent my adult children.
Doing Life with Your Adult Children: Keep Your Mouth Shut and the Welcome Mat OutFinding Joy in the Empty Nest: Discover Purpose and Passion in the Next Phase of LifeEmpty Nest, Full Life: Discovering God's Best for Your NextThe Well-Watered Woman: Rooted in Truth, Growing in Grace, Flourishing in FaithThe Wisdom of Menopause (4th Edition): Creating Physical and Emotional Health During the Change
So many of you have been reading Homegrown Learners since we first began homeschooling in 2011. Now we’ve graduated children and I’d like to keep traveling through life with you.
If you are new here, don’t forget homeschool content is ABUNDANT (especially if you have a LEGO lover!).
I also send a Friday Focus newsletter each week - you can sign up below if you’d like to receive it. It contains four short pieces of information: a homeschool tip, a book recommendation, something interesting, and something beautiful. Short and sweet, because I know your time is valuable.
Tell me about yourself in the comments below.
Are you a “retired” homeschool mom like me? Or are you still on this journey?
I’d love to hear from you!
You might also like:
Two Things That Mattered Most in Our Homeschool
The Homeschool Trap